I use to think that in order to deepen your love for someone you must love unconditionally. My husband has brought to my attention that loving unconditionally is a bunch of bull.
The example he uses is, if one day I just kick him in the face four times without reason, without apology, or without remorse he cannot continue to love me unconditionally. He will start to love me with conditions. You keep kicking me we are going to have a problem.
There are conditions! Which only makes sense.
Love is so many things, but it is not one that holds a grudge or a reminder of the things you have done in the past. That was until I reminded myself of the one thing that I can not forget or forgive my husband for. I can continue to love and be in a relationship with him and I do not hold it against him all the time. I have forgiven all of the other crap he’s put me through or roadblocks we’ve encountered, so I can hold onto this and continue to love him.
Do you have something that you can not get over that your partner has done, but it does not affect your relationship? Can you move on without it lingering constantly in the back of your mind.
I truthfully only think about it when something similar happens around me, and that is not often. Share your one unforgivable act and I will share mine.