Time and time again we, meaning anyone who thinks this way. We think that the great relationships we see in public are perfect relationships. We forget that there is a real side to relationships and how couples want things to look to others.
There is work that goes into everything that is worth having. If we continue to search for perfection we will get disappointed every time. Relationships take work, effort, and going against the opinions of what others may think is best for you. Some people are not able to commit to a relationship because it does not mimic the perfect relationship they see in others.
Wake up and understand people only show you what they want you to see. They may fight like cats and dogs behind closed doors but love and dramatically act as if there is no one else in the world they would rather be with in public.
Confession, sometimes I look at couples and the personality of one of the people in the relationship and I’m like, how are they together she is mean or he has such a foul mouth and the other person is significantly different. What we see in some, others may see differently and that is how relationships are.
I’m going to say my husband and I love each other very much. We enjoy each others company with or without the children being present, we share responsibilities, we can travel together, we love to do projects around the house together, we laugh together and we get along with each others family. Even when we have a difference of opinion we are able to work it out and sometimes see each other point of view. We have been married 19 years and I still cannot see myself with any other man. I only have eyes for my husband. When we are out we still hold hands, sometimes, hug on each other, flirt, and joke around more than we did when we were younger. I still can’t wait to get home to my family and talk about my day and listen to theirs. Most importantly I love that we can talk about any and everything and we support each other’s dreams and cheer each other’s accomplishments.
Does that mean we always get along and have the perfect relationship?
Not at all. We have our flaws, our disagreements, our arguments, and we even give each other the silent treatment, but I wouldn’t change our relationship with any other. My expectation is not that everything will always be the best, but I have to be willing to work through things that we can make better. As long as the effort is still there we can continue to have a successful marriage.
Look at your partner and think am I more happy than sad with you, are we growing as a couple or growing apart, do we want the same things in life but may want to achieve them differently, can we enjoy each others company or would we rather be on our devices when we have alone time, can I be honest with you and you with me, does your partner lack things you just can’t live without or can you be happy with his/her flaws, do you love each other and show it somehow every day or do you all happiness depend on money and materialistic things?
Find “your” perfection in your relationship and build on that. We are not all perfect so stop trying to find perfection in a person and love yourself so that your relationship can continue to be a thriving, loving, and strong commitment.