Always a 10

The old saying goes, A woman should always look her best in public and at home, if they are married or living with a partner.  My mom would always say that to me when I was looking less than stellar.

She would insist that I make myself “presentable” before my husband gets home from work. She would insist I put on something nice, put a little makeup on, and fix my hair. 

Mind you, I am raising five children and during the times they were newborns or under the age of 2, she is lucky I brushed my teeth let alone showered.

I get it, but I feel differently.  I have not been writing this past week because I have been sick. I mean ugly sick. When I am feeling not my best the last thing I am thinking about is being cute for my husband. I feel we have been together for over 15 years, if you can’t accept my ugly as well as my beauty then you have the wrong woman.

My husband on the other hand is not impressed by makeup and sass.  He appreciates me more when I am all natural, including my hair. When I am sick he is very attentive to my needs and if I fuss over my hair or my breath, he reminds me that getting better is what’s important not my appearance.

I look at my mom and she truly keeps it together. She never wears sweat pants, I think in her older age she started wearing gym shoes, her hair is always together, and she always has on some lipstick and blush. I admire that about her, but that has never been me and never will be me.

I dress up and put on a little makeup sometime, but my look is definitely comfort.

My mom says a woman who cares about how she looks, always, is going to knock my husband off his feet. I say go for it girl, I don’t have the energy to compete.

I feel a man knows what he has underneath all the fluff. I would like to think the real me is what makes him stay.

I have had my husband watch those makeup videos on youtube and he is impressed with how women transform themselves, unbelievable, he says. He also says he feels sorry for men who are dating, because they will never know what they are getting. He feels men should require their woman within the first five dates to go natural. No makeup, no protective hair styles, no weave, no fake nails, no fake eyelashes, no girdle, no waist trainer, and no enhancement on any body part. With the exception of those body parts that have been surgically done. Ask them to Alicia Keys themselves. I think that’s fair.

Well what do you think, is it important to always be a 10 or should you have too? Men are not faced with this double standard.