Morning Routines of Successful Marriages

Although I hate the idea of something being routine (routine meaning doing the same thing every day.) due to losing track of time and you look up and it’s 5 years later.

This is every day on repeat without incorporating new things to improve that routine. In our minds, it works which is why it is a routine that you stick with until it doesn’t serve you anymore.

If you are a couple who lives by structure and routine then consider adding or switching up your morning routine a little, especially if you are in a marriage that has become very routine (secret word for boring).

I know mornings are quick-paced with a goal in mind, which is getting to wherever you need to be on time.

This is especially true when you have children. My everyday routine consists of getting out of the house on time and everyone (my kids) where they need to be, successfully. When I accomplish those days without effort I celebrate with a smile and a pat on the back. “You did that girl!”

Trust me I don’t have many of those days. Still, it’s nice to say, I have a routine for getting this family and myself out into the world with a positive attitude about themselves and the beautiful-minded people they encounter along the way.

Now in my marriage, because of my hectic morning routine and my husband leaving hours before I open an eye we use to text during our lunch break and check in with, “Good Morning” as if that was the first time that day we had acknowledged we had a partner. That’s marriage sometimes, but it doesn’t have to be. A small gesture to let each other know you are still in this marriage with all your love is possible, even in the morning.

Below are 7-morning routines of successful marriages

• Start with saying Good Morning. I know so simple but believe it or not, not everyone speaks in the morning. My kids would walk past me in the hall and not even mumble a hi. I had to initiate the greeting with enthusiasm. Yes I did get looks of “are you crazy it’s 5 am, nothing is good about this morning.” but they were wrong. You are breathing and able to use all five senses. If nothing more that should bring you a good morning. In a marriage waking up with the person, you made vows to should be enough to make you feel like it’s a good morning. You can reach out and touch this person and that is a blessing. My husband and I wake at different times, but he will wake for just a moment to say “Morning, have a nice day” and send me off with a kiss. Silly enough but it gives me the nudge to face the day with a good attitude even though I know the hustle and bustle of life is ahead.
• A kiss. It does not have to be a long passionate kiss, but that doesn’t hurt if it is, just something lingering that is not a peck. Take the time to recognize that you are blessed to be in a marriage with someone that you love. Right before you go in for that kiss think about something that makes you smile about your relationship and then allow that to create the intensity of the kiss. It takes less than a minute to remind each other that you are loved and that you are here.
• Take on one of the morning tasks of the other person. For example, I am the one who gets the kids up in the morning, mostly because I am a morning person. On days when I am beat up from the day before my husband will wake before me and set my routine in motion. Although the noise level wakes me within 5 minutes of him doing it, the thought goes further than the action in this scenario. He saw that I was struggling and he tried to take something off my plate. It makes you feel seen and appreciated. This gesture can be something as small as making coffee, starting the shower, lovingly encouraging your partner to get up and start the day or my favorite starting the car on cold winter days (Yes I am one of the last individuals who do not have automatic start-up)
• Playing a song that you know makes the other person smile. I use to listen to music in the morning as I got ready but I don’t take the time anymore. I just wait until I’m in the car to turn on the radio. This is so easy if you have a smart speaker like Alexa or Google. You can just ask them to play the tune of the music the other person likes as you walk out the door or even better schedule it to play at their normal waking time. It is such a great feeling when you wake and realize what’s playing on your speaker, talk about a mood changer. Music definitely does that and to know someone thought enough about you to program it to play when you wake is the icing on the cake.
• A little note of love or kindness. You know how sometimes you would take an extra minute and write your child a message on the napkin that is going in their lunch, imagine the joy when that child opens their lunch bag and sees a note from their mom or dad. Same with adults. Leave a message on the steering wheel of their car, on the fridge, on the bathroom mirror, or best of all the back window of their car so when they look in the rearview mirror they see a sweet note from you. Kind of corny I know, but they would love it. One year my children and I filled my husband’s truck with balloons and wrote on the windows happy birthday messages. the look on his face was priceless. It’s the little things that keep a marriage going.
• Wake up a few moments early and have a chat. I know, who has time for that, but you make time. This is not the time to talk about bills, the kids, or work. This is 5 minutes of reconnecting. Only words that will connect you mentally and spiritually. It should be a breath of fresh air like when you say your affirmations or give thanks for the things in your life. Let your partner know that your life is better with them in it.
• Lastly, this one takes a little more time than the others and requires some setup. I have watched my dad for years start my mothers day with a cup of coffee and a bowl of oatmeal. Imagine waking up every day knowing that your love has joy in bringing you your first meal. In this particular post, it does not have to be coffee or oatmeal. It could be a muffin once a week, some fresh fruit on Mondays to start the week off sweet, Starbucks on Friday, or a yummy treat for them to savor for later. These are only suggestions and if you know your partner you know what makes them happy.

These are just a few things that make life a little more satisfying and create an unbroken bond between you and your spouse. Try it out and share with me if it has made a difference in your relationship and share some of your marriage bonding morning routines.

Marriage is what you make it, so make it great every chance you get.